The JOY of missing out

As we begin to approach that time of year where you feel the pressure to do ALL THE THINGS, the release of this book, The Joy of Missing Out, could not have come at a better time. But who are we kidding–it’s not just the holiday season people feel consumed by, overwhelm has become a way OF LIFE.

If you find yourself in that spot and not even sure where to start, this book is a great resource. The Author, Tonya Dalton, takes you through a bit of her personal story while giving you strategies to get focused in your life and get rid of all that clutter in your schedule. She even gives you a whole chapter on key phrases to help you become more confident in saying NO. It reminds me a lot of another favorite book of mine, Essentialism, which also has a focus on dialing into what matters at work specifically, so that you can have a greater impact. I feel that these messages are so incredibly important now more than ever.

As someone who is a bit of a homebody, I have felt for a long time that I have to constantly explain why I DON’T want to go somewhere or do something, when to be honest the simple answer is I just don’t want to and I need whitespace. Space to dream, to be, to just enjoy my home and my family or heck just alone time! I have no interest in partaking in the busy crazy life everyone else seems to be living. It was not always that way, though.

“It feels silly because we are grownups and we don’t think we need recess. But we do. Whitespace is essential for our own well-being.” -Tonya Dalton, The Joy of Missing Out.

There was a period of my life that I certainly did live to please everybody and say yes to everything. I was the person that crammed my schedule to the brim. To nobody’s surprise, I was exhausted from always being ‘on’, broke from spending money on things I thought I needed to do or have, and overwhelmed by all the projects/responsibilities/work I kept saying yes to. Sound familiar? It was not until I became a parent that I began to lean into only the things that mattered, because my time became so precious. I started saying said NO all the time, even when I did not have a reason to give. I became more focused and efficient at work. My life became more clear.

I really enjoy the simple things in life, especially with my family. Frozen pizza Friday movie nights. Bike rides around the neighborhood. Rainy mornings at our favorite coffee shop and library. Could we do more? Sure. And sometimes we do. But our girls are toddlers and it is a magical yet challenging age. Literally all they care about is being with me (no really it is ALL THEY CARE ABOUT LORD HELP ME I AM SUFFOCATING) and to them a trip to the grocery store is an adventure and to be honest, it is sometimes all the adventure I can handle for a day if you know what I mean.

My life isn’t perfect by any means and there are a lot of things I am still trying to figure out (like..ALOT) but I will continue have joy in missing out and really dialing into the things that are important. Deep relationships and quality experiences. Because the idea of JOMO- is missing out on all that extra crap so that you can NOT miss what really matters. Whitespace. Things that bring you joy. Time with family & friends.

I challenge you to really look at your calendar and your obligations, especially this time of year. Build that ‘NO’ muscle. Let’s stop saying yes to all the things we think we should be doing so that we can finally enjoy life shall we? Stay blessed in the mess! 🙂

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