Still Paralyzed by COVID Confusion

Last year I wrote an essay titled  Paralyzed by Covid Confusion because I was so overwhelmed by the majority of information I was wading through to make decisions for my family and aware that much of this information was for lack of a better word…BS. 

Fast forward 15 months later and unfortunately not much has changed. Despite my serious efforts to research, stay informed and hear people out. 

I watched a presentation being given by the Chief Medical Officer at LSU a week or so ago.  She spoke with compassion, with honest genuine fear and concern and exhaustion. Urging people to get vaccinated and wear masks for the sake of the hospitals. I was moved by it. 

Shortly after I listened to another doctor speak out about the vaccine and his concerns, the science behind this virus and his frustrations with the CDC & mask mandates. He was well spoken and everything he said made sense. I was moved by that too. 

In the last 18 months I have listened to every podcast and read every article I can get my hands on put together by reputable common sense people on both sides of the mask & vaccine topic. I have had real live respectful conversations (imagine that) with people I love that have very different opinions.  I should have all the information I need to discern what is right…yet I am no closer to the truth. 

There are people that think Covid is 100% a hoax and that think wearing a mask is censorship and that people who buy into covid must be ‘sheep’ and that masking our children is child abuse. I don’t fit in with them. 

Then there are people who will do everything the CDC says without any question.  They will push vaccines and shame those that don’t have one, treating you like a leper. I don’t fit in with them either. 

I read something recently that talked about ‘The Exhausted Majority’ and for the first time since this pandemic began, I felt SEEN. Politically speaking, a few minutes on social media and you might be led to believe that people are either ‘left’ or ‘right’ (also referred to as wings).  But research shows that to be quite the opposite, the majority of people fall somewhere in the middle…and are not as loud about it.

The ‘exhausted majority’ represents two-thirds majority Americans, who aren’t part of the Wings. Although they appear in the middle of our charts and graphs, most members of the Exhausted Majority aren’t political centrists or moderates. On specific issues, their views range across the spectrum.” -

The majority of people believe that COVID is real and dangerous but they also believe it has been terribly politicized and manipulated. 

The majority feel for the healthcare workers and educators and businesses who are doing their best in an impossible situation and yet getting their character attacked on a daily basis.

The majority don’t really want to wear a mask (I mean honestly who does?) But will wear one without issue if it truly makes a difference. 

The majority are not actually afraid of contracting COVID but of passing it to someone.

The majority don’t actually believe the vaccine is bad or that CDC and scientists are out to destroy us,  but they also fully respect and understand why some might be hesitant about it and don’t judge.

The majority desperately want to know what exactly we should stand up for. But when both ‘sides’ use shame and condescension as a tool…neither seem right. 

The majority understand that there is more to all of this than we know and refuse to live in the extremes.  But we are exhausted from being surrounded by angry righteous extremists.

The majority of us are regular average people trying to make the best decisions for us and our families and the world…yet our questions are not being answered. Our concerns are met with eyerolls. We are confused. We are tired. We are doing our best in a world that seems to make no sense.


  • Carrie

    Thank you so much for writing these words – I relate SO much to what you are describing. And as much as it feels discouraging and exhausting to feel a bit stuck in this place, there is also something deeply relieving about knowing others out there are feeling similar feelings! May God help show us the way through this!

  • Kim

    I deeply feel this. I do agree. We are more confused and divided as ever, and I don’t agree with a lot of people. Trusting our gut instincts should be validated, not discriminated. I could go on and on…I see both sides, but I no longer live in as much fear.

  • Corinne Rodrigues

    I understand your concerns and confusion and appreciate that you are not in one ‘camp’ or the other!
    Living in India, we don’t really enjoy the luxury of such choices. It was pretty clear to us from the start that we need to get vaccinated as soon as vaccines were available. Our health system just cannot cope as the population is just too large. We experienced terrible times in April this year as oxygen was in short supply!

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